the best damn sinner

Sometimes I think about how I would want people to describe me. I am not sure if normal people do this, but I do.

The funny thing is, when you think of these words it forces you to wonder, if asked, what would people describe you as now? Some descriptions are probably not so sugar-coated.

As far as negatively, I think people would describe me as:

late. busy. judgmental. lost. selfish. hypocritical. closed-minded. idealistic.

That is probably just the start of what people would say if asked. While those things are all true in their own respects, that doesn't describe Jesus.

*****

Here are some words I would love to embody. Some I work on, some I don't. Some need major attention. Some come naturally. Some may seem to contradict, but I think there is a healthy balance somewhere in the inbetween.

self-controlled. patient. inwardly beautiful. joyful. smiley. respectful daughter. forgiving friend. loving sister. faithful. bold. peaceful. loving without expectations. fun. gentle. spontaneous. disciplined. smart. witty. winsome. servant. sacrificial. authentic. compassionate. forgiving. honest. courageous. quiet leader. fair. unbiased. open to ideas, but secure in my beliefs. selfless. enthusiastic. optimistic. idealistic. thankful. receptive.

really... i just want to imitate jesus. day in and day out. i want people to see the light of Christ that shines on me totally naturally. i want to be so transformed by Him, that my life is a pure reflection of his perfect character. (yes, I realize I can't be perfect... but I can strive for perfection!).

At one of my 4783083 funerals I went to this past year, a guy got up and described the man who died as the best sinner you will ever meet. What a beautiful way to be known.


Have you ever thought about this? How would you want to have people describe you? How do you think people describe you now?

the thrill of the chaste

I just read a book called "the thrill of the chaste."

Yes. I have become "that girl."

Anyways, this book, while awkward and slightly TMI at points, is insightful. It is a realistic memoir of a woman who realized how badly she was screwing up her life and her view of love by the cheap love she was seeking in one-night stands.

Dawn Eden does a beautiful job of relating Jesus to all things not-Jesus.\

Here are a few just random ramblings about the book. :)

*****

She was describing the unique picture that marriage resembles. It is a representation of the greater marriage between Jesus and his bride-- the Church. When men and women get married, they are showing a commitment on the deepest level. Yet why is it that secular people see the importance in marriage also? While they may not understand that marriage is a picture of the unity between Christ and his bride, they still cry, rejoice, and cheer at weddings. It is because we all can see and feel something greater being represented in marriage. It isn't just an excuse to have sex or live together, but it represents a deep agreement and commitment of eternity with one another. Even non-Christians understand that.

That is the purpose of marriage. To show your friends and family that you are giving yourself to another person.

Why then does our culture excuse casual sex so nonchalantly?

"When a man and woman live together in harmony, and there is a peace between them, the Divine presence dwells in their midst. The reason for this is that when you take two things which are by definition opposites and bring them together, this is a microcosm of the purpose of the creation of the world."--Rabbi Jay Spero

Describing the difference between men and women, she says, "Women are soft on the outside and hard on the inside, while men are hard on the outside and soft on the inside." I love that. What a cool picture of how God created us to really complete one another.

The Aidenator.

This is Aida Elle.

She has an "aural hematoma." Which means, she has a blood clot in her ear. (Notice the ear that is sticking out all funny?-- it is really swollen that big!) It feels like a big pocket of water is in her ear flap. Apparently these are caused by ear infections. My baby has had an ear infection for a while now! Poor thing!!! Luckily, hematomas aren't painful, just uncomfortable for doggies. We will definitely be taking a trip to the vet tomorrow. They can drain her ear, but that usually will take 4-5 times of draining it for the hematoma to go away for good. The alternate option is surgery. :( Oh goodness. I will be a wreck if she has to get surgery!!!

Anyways. This is what is happening in my life. :( My poor girl!

10+ Things I Want to do Before I Die

(not in any particular order)

1) See all Seven Natural Wonders of the World
2) Visit every country in the world (Not sure how feasible this is)
3) Visit every continent
4) Save someone's life
5) Be part of a flash mob
6) Memorize a whole book of the Bible
7) Be on some sort of reality gameshow
8) Learn five or more languages
9) Get published
10) Adopt a child(ren)
11) Go to a Yankees World Series Game

There are a lot more by the way. I'll just keep this as a running list. :)

Jacqueline Talia

If I was on facebook yesterday, my status would have read: "Happy birthday to the best friend anyone could ask for!"

It was my bff's birthday. Can I just tell you how much I love her?! We have been besties for seven years, and she really is my other half. She definitely knows me better than I know myself.

We are funny in that we are alike in really different ways. Just not your typical, we dress the same, look the same kind of friendship. It is wayyy cooler than that! ;) But yes, we definitely do the whole i-always-finish-your-thoughts-and-know-what-you-are-thinking thing. We are cute like that.

Her family is my family and mine is hers. She is the most protective person of me and will definitely give you her honest opinion. I love those things about her!! :)

I am so blessed to have someone to call my best friend. I couldn't ask for someone better. :) 

I love you, Linely. I can't wait to celebrate 80 more with you. :) 

Every year, my dad makes us go around the table and say one thing that we are thankful for. Usually I dread this because I never can think of something profoundly deep than just "family... friends...etc...". Well, this year, my dad is out of town, so we probably won't go around the table.

But this may be the first year I have actually thought about what I am thankful for.

I am thankful for grace. God's unchanging character. His timelessness. His beauty. His sacrifice for my sinned, blemished self. For His one and only Son.

I am thankful that despite the fact that I am tarnished, and I am covered with stains and sin, He still loves me. He bridges the gaps that I can't do alone. He fulfills me. Completes me. He runs to meet me, with arms wide open. He cheers for me. He cries with me. He speaks to me.

I am thankful for my Jesus. The One who makes life worth living. The One who challenges me and pushes me to be not of this world. The One who allows me to see the bigger picture. The One who reminds me that there is more. There is hope.

He would be my answer to "What are you thankful for this year?"

Jesus.
My Savior.
My Creator.
My Friend.

"He who counts the stars and calls them by their names, is in no danger of forgetting His own children. He knows your case as thoroughly as if you were the only creature He ever made, or the only saint He ever loved."

--C.H. Spurgeon